Unsolicited testimony; unexpected sex change

Woo hoo! The plaques have been made. And they look so... so... legitimate. Here's a teaser:

They're black brass; the engraving is gold. Delightful. Don't you want to attend Phase Two?

The wonderfully-named Rex M. Tubbs at The Engraving Connection turned my order around at lightning speed and didn't question just what in the heck I was up to. Thank you, Rex, even though the shipment was addressed to "Richard", not "Rachel." I guess that's what I get for meticulously spelling my last name but assuming my first name translates fluently over the phone.